No mans land....

I left for US last month. The thought i penned while sitting at Indira Gandhi International Airport...

"An idle mind is a devils workshop...so people they say.. i have my flight at 2.30 in the morning and i have 3 more hours!!! 3 more hours and i don't have anything to do n too scared to sleep!!! so this idle mind decided to write....
Frankly, i don't understand why i am feeling so low on leaving India.. i don't want to sound being unpatriotic!! jus i wanted to understand... what is a nation, or a country...
i mean, what is India or what is USA - A political entity, bounded by clearly demarcated geographical boundaries, and added to it a good deal of socio-economic, military, historical and religious factors... add all this together and we get it - The birth of a Nation!!!
Not that i am a cynic... i and jus trying to examine something in detail - something that i have taken for granted always...theoritically then, me leaving one geographical confinement for another should not make me feel down... but in actual, the fact that maybe i wont be able to come back here for some years was upsetting... i was like a doctor who has broken his leg... he knows what is causing the pain, but this knowledge does not reduce the pain!!! OR, was my definition of a nation wrong???
This geographical and cultural concept also raises some serious question..to what extent are we moulded by our surroundings? Am I an indian because i was born in this country? suppose i was born in US or say i was a Paki... would i have been different? would i have still liked the same tastes, the same colours ar the same type of music? Would i have liked Rock and blues if i was born in US? I dont know the answer...
one more flaw that i am observing in the geographical model is that the nation then becomes a function of time... patriotism, limited by the view of nation in such model then becomes extremely fuzzy...suppose we take the case of a soldier from Tamil Nadu, who died for undivided india who died protecting Sindh. So is he a patriot? think about it... he was a fellow born in India who died protecting Pakistan.. In todays scene, he will be called a traitor, a spy etc etc etc..but we know he is an Indian patriot... the fallacy in the argument is obvious... then we have to accept that geography model needs serious correction...
so what is a nation - a concept? a philosophy? a way of life?... a nation is a concept no doubt, but there is much more to it ... it is not a philosophy like Marxism... I think nation is a way of life...the way ones goes about his or her day to day life.. makes sense? actually does not much to me but thats the only option left my method of elimination!!! but i makes sense... i am missing india because i will be leaving a lifestyle with which i was very familiar... i was venturing into a world whose lifestyle was not the sane as mine...
However, though it made sense, it seemed very simplistic... if it was a way of life, why did i feel happy when India won T-20 cup? why i feel elated when Tata buys Corus? do people can die or take life for a way of life??? well i don't know..."
I dont wan tthis to be read as an article as it was never meant to be one... i had extracted it from my diary because i felt its something many people might have felt... i don't want the answer because i know that there is no correct answer for my question....